This essay is shared by Remez Sasson
The wind is blowing very strongly. The tall big trees stand erect, and do not let the wind sway them. As the wind gets stronger it breaks them up, and some trees get uprooted altogether and fall down.
There are some shrubs growing near the trees. When the wind blows they just bend down, and let it pass away.
We can behave like the trees or like the shrubs. We need to know when to bend down and when to resist. There are times that call for bending down. When this bending is done willingly and wisely, it is not a sign of weakness or spinelessness.
Sometimes we cannot change situations. We try and try and it seems that we can do nothing. It is possible to go on fighting incessantly, wasting time and energy, and it is possible to quit. Quitting under these circumstances is not a sign of weakness; it is a sign of wisdom.
There is a lot of wrong thinking concerning acceptance. We associate the word with incompetence, failure, and weakness. Some interpret acceptance as giving up without trying.
A wise person knows when to persist, resist, and not give up until he succeeds. He also knows that there are times when acceptance turns into winning.
How many times have you fought in vain, when something you did not like happened to you? How many times have you argued and quarreled with people, only to find out later that they were right? If you were a little more patient and accepted their words or suggestions, you would have spared yourself a lot of trouble.
Do you remember times in your life, when you persisted in a line of action that yielded no results? If you could have accepted and acknowledged that a certain situation or way of action was fruitless, you may have found other better options for action, and stopped banging your head against the wall.
When a fly enters the house it wants to get out. It sees the world outside through the windowpane, and flies in that direction to go out, but it keeps banging against the glass. This thing can go on for hours. We sometimes behave in the same manner. If we could stop for a moment and consider all the options, we might find other ways to do or get what we want.
Have you been trying to change the opinions of your spouse for years with no avail? Stop it, and consider that he or she is entitled to their opinions.
Do you try to keep on lifting heavy weights in order to show off in front of the young people at the gym club? Do you feel frustrated that you cannot do what they do? Accept it that your body is different, or older.
On the other hand, telling yourself that you cannot do something without even trying is true defeat! Acceptance is not giving up without a struggle. I don’t tell you to accept whatever people tell you and do to you. This means becoming a doormat or a sponge.
True acceptance usually comes after a long struggle. It is only after trying and being convinced that either you are not on the right path, or you find out the situation is hopeless that you stop your efforts. When you find that your efforts do not take you closer to your objective accept the fact and move on.
Real acceptance comes from strength, an open mind and true wisdom.