Jun 112004
 

A while ago I had a dialogue with Spirit about something I thought was taking a while to manifest. I lamented over how I was sick of waiting. I’ve put so much effort into what I’ve been doing. I’ve worked so damn hard! Whine, whine, whine!

The Inner Voice/Consciousness asked me to get a pen and paper. Great, action at last!

“Write this down,” the voice said. “I want you to divide infinite number of years by 2.” (2 representing the number of years I was claiming I had been waiting.) I wrote down the number 1, followed by as many zeros I could be bothered to write down until…I gave up.
“It doesn’t register,” I said.

“What about infinite years divided by 1 million years.”
“Still doesn’t register.”

“How about infinite years divided by 1 trillion years.”
“Makes no difference,” I said. “It is negligible.”

It was then it dawned on me. Spirit was taking the mickey!

I also understood where the Voice was going with this. Whatever I do as a human separated from Consciousness means nothing. The Voice told me that to get the attention of Consciousness you have to either be self-less or move at infinite velocity. Otherwise nothing I do as a human personality makes any iota of difference.

We are running around like headless chickens (chooks to my Aussie friends) trying to change the world. Does my contribution make a difference? What about all that wonderful charity work I’m doing, does it help? Only if the work is being done through you, not as you, the personality. Hang on one minute! Surely what I’m doing matters, surely?

A while back I had this experience.

I am in a library using their Internet. Suddenly I have a feeling of being absent – not remembering who I am as this human personality. I have experienced loss of self during meditation when I feel complete oneness with Consciousness. I can now consciously achieve this state by being in Inner Silence. But to have this consciousness thrust open me during ‘my waking state’ is a bit unnerving. I look around me. I can’t for the life of me remember why I am, just that I am. I am the same everywhere. Consciousness is tapping on the keyboards. Consciousness logs into a yahoo email account called Enocia. Consciousness opens up an email. According to the contents of the email, it is from a friend of Enocia’s. At that very moment I am back in the personality state again where I am able to respond as the personality, Enocia. Thanks mate for bringing me back down to planet earth, not!

Imagine being permanently in a state of consciousness, where there is no knowledge of personality, and trying to communicate with others. You will be using words such as “we,” “us,” or “our.” This is Unity consciousness, oneness with Spirit/Consciousness/Awareness.

Do you now see why actions by the human personality-self doesn’t matter? Consciousness is Energy, the highest frequency which contains within it all types of energies. The nature of energy is omnipresence. It doesn’t understand measurements such as time or space as it is its nature to be boundless, infinite and unlimited. Energy only understands words such as “we” because it is also its nature to be all-inclusive. The purpose of the human experience is to animate this Energy. Imagine all that Energy waiting for us to connect to. We are only using a minute percentage of this Energy. Very few people are tapping into the very depths of this Energy. To do so involves letting go of the human self.

If you have ever studied teachings by spiritual teachers/masters you will note that they take no credit for their ‘works’ or teachings. They attribute all to Consciousness. The moment you think you are the one responsible, you’re thinking like a human personality.

There are some who feign humility by ascribing their works to a higher consciousness. You can’t fool Consciousness. “By their fruits you will know them.” Just because someone has all power to work signs and wonders doesn’t mean he is one with Consciousness. Anyone can learn how to use Energy to create whatever reality she fancies. If your action is not motivated by love; if your action is not the evidence of love; it means nothing.

The question I’ve raised in this piece is whether my actions matter. You know something, it’s no longer an issue. All I know is my actions are motivated by the One. What I write, for instance, comes from following inner promptings to put this information out there. These words are not my words nor are they my ideas. They originate in Consciousness. I don’t care about changing the world. The world will always exist with or without this personality. What I write is rather like a fruit tree releasing its fruits. You can either pick up my fruit and enjoy it for what it is or you can leave it to rot.

It really doesn’t matter.

We are One

Enocia Joseph

  2 Responses to “Do I Matter?”

  1. Thank you for writing this. It spoke to me at a time when I was trying to figure out what matters and I have already decided that I don’t matter. Your essay shows me that my personality doesn’t matter,but that I matter as a vehicle for consciousness to work through I will listen more closly to my consciousness from this moment on. I have recently seen how this concept works, myself, and so can apprieciate its deeper meaning.

  2. Hi Cindy,

    I’m glad you found this helpful. I’m also grateful you brought it to my awareness now.

    With love,
    Enocia