It all started when I was travelling by bus. Before I proceed, can I just say that there is a lot more to my life than travelling on buses, in case you’re wondering. No there isn’t.

Anyway, it’s another day in the Year of Our Lord called Saturday. I am on a single-decker bus, an old-fashioned type with not enough room to swing a cat, as we say in the UK. I am sitting in a single seat with my knees jammed against the seat in front of me, there is that much leg room. I can either swing my legs to the gangway and end up tripping passengers or I can find another seat with more leg room. Too late the bus is almost packed. I have a thought that I have enough room, I just think I don’t. Hmmm, time to think this one out.

I close my eyes and relax into my seat. I feel myself expand; or is it the seat has expanded? My knees seem to merge into the seat in front of me. I can no longer feel where the seat begins or where I end; or is it where I begin and where the seat ends. Oh bugger-it! Whatever is going on I’m as comfortable here as I would be in another seat with lots of leg room. I open my eyes to check whether anything has changed from the ‘material’ perspective. My knees are still jammed against the seat in front of me. Interesting, comfort really is a thought away.

It’s a new day in the Day of Our Lord they call Sunday. I’m in no mood to go out or do anything. I have the flat to myself. I’m lying on the sofa and drifting in and out of consciousness. At one point I hear a shrill sound in my left ear and I start flying at incredible speed. Then again I might just be sinking at incredible speed, it’s difficult to tell. For all I know, up is down and down is up and right is left, you get the picture. If I’m moving I have to be moving somewhere. It feels like I’m moving alright but I’m moving nowhere, fast.

Next, I am aware that I seem to be out of my body but very much aware I’m in the room. I can see myself lying on the sofa. When I first started experiencing this type of travelling, commonly called astral projection, my greatest fear was that I would not be able to return to my body. Then I got used to it. Them the fear changed to being out of my body and not being able to return; someone ends up finding me in this state and presuming I am dead.

As I hover over my body I hear the doorbell ring. I try to ‘wake’ up but can’t. I check to see who it is - my sister-in-law. She tries the doorbell again and as I’m not able to respond she lets herself in. What is she doing letting herself in? I know she and her husband have my mother’s keys for emergency but she has no right coming in without prior warning. I watch her come up the stairs and she’s in the living room where my body is. She says hello but doesn’t get a response. She shakes me and says “wakey, wakey!” I’m frantically trying to tell her that I can’t speak, I need her help but she doesn’t hear me. She goes to the kitchen. Maybe she’s brought my mother some food or something. I’m too busy trying to ‘wake up.’ Next she goes to the toilet. I need to wake up. Help! I hear a Voice telling me that in three seconds I’m going to return to my usual ‘waking’ state. I relax and soon I can feel my body. I listen out for my sister-in-law but she’s nowhere to be found.

Was that a dream? She was so real. The Voice tells me I had created the fear I’ve always had about being out of my body and being discovered in this way. My sister-in-law pops round from time to time and it was no surprise that I had used her image to create a scenario that represented my greatest fear. Why would I want to frighten myself? I am reminded of the disappointment I sometimes feel after watching a horror movie, expecting more blood and gore. This ‘trip’ was not that different. What about the other experiences I used to have during ‘astral projection’ of being groped, scratched and hearing voices that terrified me? They were all my creations based on fears that I had or shared with the collective consciousness. Because I no longer have them they are no longer manifested when I’m in this state. I also now realise that in this state I am Mind and whatever beliefs I have are immediately manifested and experienced. In 3-D reality it might take time to materialise.

There were times when I was a student when I would be watching chat shows while half asleep and end up ‘travelling’ in thought to the TV studio. I was doing my dissertation on talk shows, which meant watching lots of talk/chat shows. I was always puzzled why the presenter always seemed to have on a different outfit on the actual show compared to the show I travelled to in thought. Now I can see that I never actually travelled to those shows, I had simply reconstructed what I was hearing in thought. Astral projection suggests that one is travelling in thought. My experience demonstrates that I am not going anywhere and whatever is happening is simply a creation. When I saw reality as being outside of myself it appeared as if I was travelling to my destination. Now I understand reality to be within me in the ever-present Now and not moving, astral projection is simply creating reality from my perspective.

It is now a new day, today, another day in the Year of Our Lord, called Monday. I’m walking home with two bags of shopping. The journey is a mile long. I am in Mind. I have a thought that the weight of the bags depends on my perspective. I can feel the bags as very heavy and having to rest ever so often or I can see them for what they are, mind stuff. I project an image of myself carrying two bags and in this projection I feel nothing. When I arrive home I have to adjust my perception so I can communicate with my mother. When I lift the bags on to the kitchen table I realise they have suddenly gained weight.

For me reality is experienced in Mind. I can either experience a distorted sense of self that appears separated from Mind resulting in illusion; or I can be at one with Mind. In this state of oneness with Mind, I experience reality as infinite ideas where all is in complete harmony.

I am Mind
Enocia Joseph